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time to let it go...

So, I've been asked the same question 4 times today - "If she reaches out, be it via email, call, etc - would you talk to her?"

For me, there is no easy answer to that question. My inner bitch screams " NO NO NO NO NO! " while my inner punk yells " YES YES YES YES YES!" ( Destiny's Child, much? ) . It would be very easy to me to sit here & lie...but what good would that do any of us?!? I think I would only talk to her because I have questions that she alone holds the answers to. I need to express to her all the things I've spent days expressing to my sisters & best friends. It's very easy for everyone to tell me to let it go....but less easy for me to actually do so. I'm aware of the fact that the chances of me ever getting this " closure" are slim to none - and that I will eventually (sooner than later, of course) in fact have NO choice but to let it go.

So, I've been filling my hours & days with lots of solid yet random things. My friends are still the greatest & continue to lend their ears..although I am well aware of the fact that I am driving them nuts! *ILY, guys! xoxo* I continue to grow...become more aware of things around me...seeing the situation for what it is and not what I think/thought it should be. I just hold onto the fact that like it was said to me "THIS is not where I need to be."

...the question is - where exactly do I go from here?

*sigh* this whole being a grown up shyt sucks.
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